My house is back in order–the bowl of rooms always does the trick. I got back to the gym after my blog-birthing hiatus, and that pushed me closer to feeling like myself again (running outside is still out of the question given the 100+ temperatures over the weekend).
I forced myself to take a break from the blog yesterday. My plan is to post Monday through Saturday as long as it remains fun and I have meaningful content to add. That sounded like a lot to me when another author suggested it as a good strategy, but now a dozen ideas a day are swirling through my head. Here are a few of the topics I’ll be covering going forward:
- What is Feng Shui?
- What do I mean by Animal House?
- How will I protect my children’s privacy when I use events from our lives as illustrations of lessons I’ve learned (or am still in the process of learning)?
- What has been my process of spiritual awakening and transformation?
- What lessons did I learn from my breast cancer experience?
- How have I experienced the mind/body/soul connection in my healing process?
When a writing idea materializes, I “catch the butterfly” by jotting it down in a notepad or adding it directly to the “Catching Butterflies” file in my laptop. A mass of butterflies chased me from my dreams at 3:00 a.m. this morning, their fragile wings crashing against one another in their confinement.
Though my house was clean again, my mind was still cluttered. It was creative clutter–not as bad as negative or worry clutter–but clutter nonetheless. I considered getting up and releasing the butterflies to the computer, in the same way that Dumbledore pulled memories out of his head with a wand and deposited them into the Pensieve (I’ve been looking for one of those on Amazon).
Sleep, though, is something I know I need. Though I am an early riser by nature, getting up at 3:00 a.m. would wreck me for the rest of the day. So I lay on my back and practiced mind clearing. Eckhart Tolle’s advice to escape from obsessive thought patterns is to focus on the space between words. Notice your breathing; feel how the air enters your body and leaves it without you making an effort; shine the light of your awareness on the space between breaths.
Also, focus intently on your hands, paying such deep attention that you can feel the aliveness in the cells. When I practice this, I feel a tingling in my hands. At this point, I am so grounded in my deepest “self” that there is no room for obsessive thought patterns to distract me. It’s never a linear progression, though. It’s always two steps forward, one step back. When a thought manages to break through, I calmly start over again.
After starting over many many times, I finally managed to connect with sleep (including a strange dream that involved a spotted cat with a bladder problem entering our lives–analysis anyone?).
How do you handle middle-of-the-night wakefulness? Share your experience in the comment box!
Steve says
My method is really unhealthy and only works half the time at best, but I usually eat a bowl of cereal and watch a documentary or something boring on PBS. Deisy says she will lie still, close her eyes, breathe slow and think about boring things.
Martha says
Try the mind-clearing exercises I describe here, Steve, and let me know if you have any luck (it takes practice). We can talk more about it when I see you in a couple of weeks!
Isabella Friege says
Martha, it’s really inspiring to read your blog entries. I truly enjoy them. Sometimes I sit there pondering over some of the things you have said for a while, meaning you are providing me with a lot of food for thought. Sometimes it takes me the a few hours to digest. Good thing my summer work load is not as heavy ;). BTW… I love your writing style. It is so to the point and at the same time entertaining. You are very talented. And… as a little add-on: I learn at least one new word in each entry: Today it was ‘derisive’; the other day it was ‘palatable’. Great for my English proficiency level. I believe in life-long learning :)
Martha says
So glad to have you here, Isabella! One more benefit of the technology, being able to connect with friends in a meaningful way across the globe. I’m afraid I have not maintained space in my life to keep up my German since we returned four years ago. How about you start a blog and I’ll reply in German to your posts? That would be very entertaining for your readers.
Sandy says
Hi Martha!
I have found some success with sleeping “upside down”!
I move my pillow to the bottom of the bed and sleep in the reverse– strange but sometimes it does the trick!
Keep up the writing at 5:30 am– you are on a roll!
Sandy
Martha says
I’ve never heard of that, but can’t wait to try it! (Your beautiful feet deserve a place at the head of the bed every once in a while!)
Lajla Hanes says
Hi Martha…great title…regarding the sub-title…yes it is a bit long but the chaos part needs to be stated…Grandma DeLoach would probably like the title once you explained it to her..but I think she would suggest a different sub-title…”The Life and Times of the One and Only Muffie Brettschneider”.
I liked it when you said you don’t want to be a slave to the computer, preferring to be gardening, excersing,etc.THAT’S ME…I force myself to go on after the gym and water aerobics…before reading the paper and tending to my flowers…
More later..I do have a great solution for night wakefulness which doesn’t bother Stu….also I will talk about the cancer experience…you were a bright light during my initial terror….
Looking forward to keeping in touch…you have kept me on this computer longer than anyone else ever has….Lajla
Martha says
Thanks so much for contributing your thoughts, Lajla. This week I’ve been “outed” again and again as Muffie on the blog, but you are among the family and childhood friends from whom I find that endearing. I have found that the time spent on the computer feels less confining if I am engaging in meaningful discussion, which this blog is proving to be (for me at least). Thanks for taking time away from your many other passions to connect here! Can’t wait for future posts from you!