I was so relieved to hear straight from the mouth of the spiritual leader of Tibetan Buddhism that it’s not about religion.
I had already heard this message from Eckhart Tolle in his written work and when I saw him in person the previous week, but the credibility of the notion seems even stronger coming from a Nobel Laureate in a flowing red robe whose title is “His Holiness”.
The Dalai Lama was in Charlottesville, VA, last week to talk about his book Beyond Religion: Ethics for a Whole World. I haven’t read it yet (as I have stressed before, I’m still new to the party and am clawing my way up the learning curve). Amazon describes it as, “An unprecedented event: a beloved world religious leader proposes a way to lead an ethical, happy, and spiritual life beyond religion and offers a program of mental training for cultivating key human values.” I’m ordering it today, so stay tuned.
In the panel discussion I had the opportunity to attend, the Dalai Lama and several professors from the University of Virginia’s medical and nursing schools discussed compassionate care in the practice of 21st century medicine. His Holiness was deeply impressed with the work the university is doing to incorporate mindfulness and compassionate care principles into the curricula for doctors and nurses in training.
Here are just a few of the memorable statements the Dalai Lama made during that conversation, some of them through his translator:
“The essence of healing is compassion. Compassion is not a religious feature, it is a human feature. It is essential for human survival.” (This is a quote from one of the Dalai Lama’s books, cited by one of the panel members.)
“My number one commitment is promoting human compassion and affection.”
“A self-centered attitude is the most destructive. The world is filled with unnecessary problems. Animals have limited destructive acts. This ‘wonderful brain’ and its destructive emotions lead to immense problems. The root cause of all these problems is lack of empathy for others. Corruption, injustice, cheating, hypocrisy — these are rampant in religion too. In that case, the people are not only cheating other human beings, but also God.”
“Honesty, truthfulness, a sense of others’ well-being — these are what we must strive for. We must develop a sense of concern for others’ well being. We need to do this in our day-to-day life, not because we are focused on getting to heaven or reaching ‘Buddha-hood’, but because we are human.”
“There is no room for jealousy, frustration, stress, anger. What really creates inner peace? Confidence leads to a calmer mind, which leads to improved health for you and your family, and a healthy society.”
“Even religion can create more problems. Use common sense, drawn from common, personal experience. It’s not about religion.”
“Constant fear is eating our system. The importance of warm-heartedness is key to all. It’s essential to educate people (especially children) about this.”
The panel discussion ended, and everyone stood to receive the blessings of the Dalai Lama, whereby he blesses a white prayer shawl and drapes it around the neck of the person in front of him.
Instead of starting with the panel members, he walked to the edge of the stage where the two sign language translators stood in the shadows. When they saw him approaching, their eyes widened. One of them was fighting back tears, clearly emotional from being recognized, perhaps for the first time ever in the course of her quiet work on the margin. The Dalai Lama took her face in his hands and cooed at her, making her tears run faster. The gesture summed up everything about him, particularly the power of compassion.
I am happy to share my more detailed notes from the panel discussion. Just let me know in the comments or through my contact page if you’d like a copy, and I’ll send them along.
Bill Apablasa says
How exciting. I’d love to hear more. In fact, your post got me so pumped up I just downloaded the book to my IPad. And to see Eckhart Tolle in the same week! Wow! Thanks for sharing!
Martha says
Yes, Bill, it was amazing. I just emailed the more detailed read-out to you. The hard copy of Beyond Religion doesn’t come out until the first week of November. I ordered it, but I may just have to download it before then onto my husband’s iPad. Thanks for the comment!
Leslie says
Wow. What a way to underscore his point. I am very glad to hear that U.Va. (my old stomping grounds) is doing more to teach students about both healing AND compassion. The two should work hand in hand. I’m happy that you got to hear him speak and learn from him.
Martha says
Great to connect with you here, Leslie! I actually posted this a couple of days ago and the email service had a glitch, so I’m grateful the different timing of the delivery worked in your favor. I was so impressed with the innovative work UVA is doing to promote mindfulness in its students. Makes me feel really hopeful.
Laura says
Hi Martha, I’d love to hear more! Thanks.
Martha says
Just emailed them to you, Laura. Take care!
Mi Young says
Compassion is essetial to human survival, yet we have to suppress it to survive in this “dog eat dog world” we live in. It is difficult to balance the two in many “real life” situations. As you have well illustrated the competitiveness in your children while playing sports, our life is filled with situations where having compassion would become a liability. How do we teach our children to be compassionate, yet be successful in life? Are we to teach our children to have courage and wisdom to go beyond dogma or wait for them to make that choice on their own? Thanks, Martha for sharing your experience. I would love to hear more.
Martha says
Thanks for the thoughtful comment, Mi Young. I just emailed my notes from the UVA talk to you. You are so right about the difficulty of teaching compassion to our children (which the Dalai Lama emphasized as being so important). I think the best we can do is lead by example. I find that if I try to tell them directly how they “should” be, it leads to immediate resistance. And it is so clear to me that the new brain research is right: teenage brains (especially in boys) are only half baked–especially the areas responsible for logic, emotions, and empathy–until their mid-20’s. Playing high level sports exacerbates their dehumanizing competitiveness, as well, though it also develops good qualities for down the road–teamwork, discipline, strategic thinking, and pushing your limits both physically and mentally. I’m just waiting it out, using the kids as practice for my own compassion (most days I fail miserably).
Doris says
….to lead by example seems a good “approach” as well to me but as you are saying, it is not always a good example we give. We should not give up though ;-)
P.s. would love to receive “the rest” of your notes! Thanks!
Martha says
Never give up, Doris! Each day is a reboot (even each hour and minute, if you can pay attention closely enough). I’ll email you the notes from the panel discussion. Same address as before?