I hadn’t set out to write a rhyming title. It just happened.
And when I asked if anybody would come with me to my first gun control rally in front of NRA headquarters on December 14th, the third anniversary of the Sandy Hook Elementary School massacre in Newtown, Connecticut, I hadn’t set out to start a grassroots initiative.
But I think that’s what’s going to happen.
“I only came because you said ‘Please’.”
My friend Cathy, whom I’ve written about before when we partnered as accountability buddies this summer, was one of four friends who were able to join me that day. “I only came because you said ‘Please’,” she told me afterwards.
While the rest of us were trying to come up with hard-hitting slogans for our protest signs, Cathy showed up at my house with a stick covered in a plastic garbage bag. Is it a weapon? I wondered to myself. Just the opposite.
Cathy had created a sign that required no words at all: a mobile of angels representing each of the Newtown victims.
Words would never be able to compete with angels.
As soon as we got to the rally, the media bombarded her.
If you had asked me, “Who is the person you know who is least likely to enjoy media attention?” I would have said Cathy. But she stood there bravely and humbly as the cameras clicked, her angles fluttering in the breeze, tangling themselves up in their excitement over being seen.
That’s what Cathy’s angels did: they provided a non-combative visual representation of the lives snatched away too soon by gun violence. Since Newtown, 90,000 more people have been killed with guns in the United States.
I had a vision of an entire rally of 90,000 angels fluttering in the wind.
Cathy was featured on the second page of the Washington Post the next day.
Mindful Protest
The outpouring of support for Cathy’s statement has been incredible.
People are looking for a way to make their voices heard, but they don’t know how. For many, work and family commitments prevent them from showing up at rallies. For many others, the fear of conflict gets in the way. Others simply don’t know who to call or the best places to contribute money.
And opinions differ on exactly what should be done to address the gun violence epidemic in our country. Most middle-of-the-road people don’t feel equipped or don’t have the stomach to jump into that ugly debate.
But the image of souls plucked from us too soon connects all of us.
Nobody can argue with the reality that these were loved ones–mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, daughters, sons–ripped away in an instant of violence. No matter what your political affiliation, we can all feel that pain. It’s part of our shared humanity.
Cathy’s angels send a signal. We, as a country, want our lawmakers to act in the interest of humanity, not in the interest of the NRA and gun manufacturers. Our lawmakers need to know that we are fed up and are informing ourselves on how the system works–the NRA’s political contributions, financed by gun manufacturers, are buying votes in congress. Politicians need to get the message that the number of people who want reasonable gun control outnumbers the “I support the NRA and I vote” bumper stickers.
But we can leave the screaming to other people. Screaming isn’t effective anyway. It puts people on the defensive, and when we’re on the defensive ego gets in the way of higher thinking, no matter what side you’re on. It’s simply unproductive.
Practical solutions have been put on the table (which do not entail taking away everyone’s guns, but do entail obvious steps like background checks and closing gun show loopholes). It’s up to our elected officials to prioritize public safety over political contributions.
Cathy’s angels are calling to us.
Our little band of conflict-averse moms is going to take this energy and share it with others. We don’t know what we’re doing, but it will start with a Facebook page. We don’t even have a name for it yet, but we all feel called to act.
Purpose is a funny thing. Even in this busiest time of year, we feel compelled to start this right now. It doesn’t feel stressful. It’s an almost calming feeling knowing that we are listening to the whispers of our hearts.
And the whispers of our hearts are telling us to spread the power of silent angels. How many more will come if we simply say, “Please”?
If you are with us, share your support in the comments!
***
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Scott G says
Looking forward to joining in with your “call to action” in this hugely important topic.
Martha Brettschneider says
Thanks, Scott! I’ll keep you posted!! <3 Martha
sally flynn says
this is terrific. i was struck by you saying this doesnt feel stressful. It is in some ways a relief to have a way to quiet the voice in my head that is always saying “why aren’t you doing something?” Thank you for giving me a way. I’m all in – please keep me informed .
Martha Brettschneider says
Thank you, Sally. I’ve grown very aware of the fact that stress manifests in my body only when I am out of alignment with my purpose and intention. You are so right about it being a relief to learn that we can learn to still the thoughts in our head that don’t serve us. I’ll keep you posted on our progress! :-) Martha
tim kness says
When I first saw Martha post an image of this amazing form of visual communication on Facebook, my initial gut reaction was to think “Will anyone understand what’s she’s trying to get across? There needs be some sort of sign to tell people what it represents…”, but I held my tongue. I wanted to see how it all played out. And how wonderfully it played out indeed. Clearly, no words are sometimes far more powerful, (and in some cases far more approachable) than having a large sign that “screams” out to those who may happen to look your way.
What I realized was that something as simple as a umbrella frame with paper angels hovering overhead can be a far more effective tool for creating conversation and getting one’s point across. For even if someone doesn’t realize what her “sign” represents, they’re far more likely to come up and ask… to engage with an individual, to create a level of curiosity and to be far more able to connect.
In this day and age of individuals trying to be heard, a first thought may be to garner a big white piece of poster board with huge BOLD letters screaming out your point. Or, as this example shows, outstretched arms (or wings) may be far more inviting method of not only getting your point across, but to create a lasting impression.
Thanks for the wonderful post my friend Martha!!
Martha Brettschneider says
Thanks so much for the generous and thoughtful support, Tim. I think we already made progress today. I enjoyed my conversation with your NRA member friend on Facebook. We found common ground. He made the valid point that there is too much vilifying of the entire category of gun owners. It doesn’t move the conversation forward. He supports their training and education programs. I agree we could use more of that — wouldn’t it be awesome if gun ownership required a license and training in the same way that driving a car does. I also pointed out that it’s easier to buy a gun at a gun show than it is for me to buy a package of Sudafed from the pharmacist. Productive, non-combative conversation that focused on listening rather than yelling. Thanks for sharing it with your circles, Tim! ~ Martha
Mia Gardiner says
Martha – Thank you, once again, for writing down words that float around in my mind but never get to paper; for taking the lead on getting your family and friends more involved; and for reminding us that actions can speak louder than words, though your words today were very powerful. Today’s blog is another call for us all to participate in something that surrounds and concerns us every day. We can make a difference…. we can’t leave it up to someone else to do (that surely hasn’t work), we can become more knowledgable about where to show our support and how….. the semi-annual contributions to the Brady campaign, the voting for the supposedly correct
pro-gun control candidate clearly are not enough. Your blog reminds and encourages us to do better. And thanks to your friend Cathy for her beautiful, meaningful, impacting saying, by showing, what is in our hearts. I will be with you at the next rally. Much love, Mia
Martha Brettschneider says
What a lovely reply, Mia. I’m so glad the message resonated. And yes, we CAN make a difference. It’s time! Hugs, Martha
Mark Montgomery says
Great post, Martha. And kudos to Cathy, too.
Martha Brettschneider says
Thanks a bunch, Mark. I know you are also passionate about this issue. Thanks for the encouragement! :-) ~ Martha
Shirlee says
I’m in! Can’t wait to join your FB page. Using FB will definitely get the word out. In fact I’ll contribute the first $20 to “boost” the page.
Martha Brettschneider says
Wow, Shirlee! I hadn’t even gotten that far yet. Good thinking! I’ll put you down for the first boost once we are up and running! THANK YOU!! ~ Martha
David Kanigan says
Beautiful post. And your friend Cathy, she is something special. The image of her holding angels won’t leave me soon.
Martha Brettschneider says
Thanks so much for the kind words, David. Yes, Cathy is something special to be sure. Stay tuned for new adventures with Cathy and others in 2016! Happy holidays to you and your family. ~ Martha
Alys Milner says
Though the press may have made Cathy uncomfortable, she stood her ground, holding those paper angels high. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and deeds on the subject of gun control. I often despair at what feels like lack of movement toward sensible laws regarding guns. I was born in Canada to a Canadian mom and a British dad, both countries that have traditionally limited guns. The numbers don’t lie. I wish I knew the way forward for this country. Such a tragic waste of so many lives.
Martha Brettschneider says
I agree, Alys, on the frustration of not seeing any forward movement. I’ve reached the tipping point, though, no longer content to simply stand by and watch it without taking any action myself. Cathy and I and another friend will be capitalizing on the power of her angel carrier. We met several days ago to hash out the outlines of a grassroots initiative for people who might not be comfortable with the traditional means of protest but want their voices heard. I’ll keep you posted. I know you are a crafty person, so this might appeal to you. One feature of our initiative will be to provide a template for people to make their own angels to use at their local events, or to send to us to carry at larger events, or simply to photograph and post to our Facebook page and website (both still to come). It will be a non-confrontational way to make voices heard, sending a message to legislators that we want public safety to be prioritized to honor the lives lost every day to gun violence. Stay tuned! Hope you had a wonderful Christmas with your family! Hugs to you, Martha